“Every step is a new PR!” these were the encouraging words my better half kept reminding me after mile 9 of my first 12 mile long run this past weekend. I wish I could say I was reveling in my accomplishment and hearing the hum of my cadence saying winner with each step, however that was not the case. I was thinking about my thighs. Dear lord nothing compares to the pain and despair of realizing you are chaffing and you still have 3 miles left to run. Needless to say my motivation was pretty low. But, someone once told me, sometimes you just have to think about putting one foot in front of the other. Even though with each stride I felt my thighs get a little more raw, I finished my first 12 mile run at a 10 min pace meaning a nice 1,200 calories burned. The reward was, of course, Arby’s (my cheat day food) roast beef sandwiches and extra large tubs of curly fries. I spent the rest of the day laying on the couch finishing up the first season of True Detective while my legs refused to stay still. You would think that after running for two hours straight your legs would be perfectly content not moving. Mine decide they would like to be moved every 5 seconds. Which didn’t seem to bother these two!
The more time passed after the run the more I realized I was starting to romanticize my run. I had thoughts like “That run wasn’t all that bad” “I was barely chaffing” “I wasn’t that thirsty” “Eh I probably could have run longer”. The funny thing about all these thoughts is how different they are from the inner monologue that goes on in my head during my run. Let me give you a break down by mile with my splits:
Mile 1 (9:17)- I got this! Why because I am so incredibly awesome!
Mile 2 (9:15)- Um I can totally hold this pace this is so easy I’m basically jogging.
Mile 3 (9:38)- I have how much further? Where did this wind come from? I’m pretty sure I am running in place this wind is so strong. Go away wind.
Mile 4 (9:45)- Hey, only 2 miles till I’m halfway done!!!!!! I am killing this run!
Mile 5 (10:09)- Water. Must find water. Can’t go on with out water.
Mile 6 (10:43)- Oh dear god I’m only halfway there…..
Mile 7 (10:05)- Why am I even running? I hate running. This is horrible I should stop. No can’t stop won’t stop.
Mile 8 (9:48)- When did my compression shorts turn in to sandpaper?! I’m not going to be able to walk for like a week.
Mile 9 (10:18)- Maybe if I try and run wider my thighs won’t slowly chafe away. Nope I look like a baby camel trying to walk for the first time.
Mile 10 (10:34)- Shut up Shut up Shut up (as my running partner attempts motivation)
Mile 11 (10:39)- This isn’t even a half marathon… what on earth have I gotten myself into.
Mile 12 (10:13)- Ahhhhhh! Oh thank god I’m done. Where’s my Arby’s?